Ten Things I Learned About Parenting from Doggie Obedience School

Our puppy Shadow is a proud graduate of puppy kindergarten. (And for the record, if you are in the Carson City area and need a good trainer, I highly recommend Joanna from Fur and Feather Works.) After every Saturday class, one thought that kept coming to mind: I should really work harder at applying dog-training concepts to parenting. Here are some things I learned:

1. Never repeat your command to your kid dog . If you repeat your command, you tell your kid dog that he doesn't have to listen the first time around. 
2. Yelling and violence are not necessary. Now, for the record, I don't use violence with my kids or dog, but I will be the first to admit that sometimes I get really frustrated and yell. What Joanna taught me is that dogs don't choose the alpha dog based on strength or willpower, but rather from a sense of dignity and respect for one's elders. Respect is earned, not forced.
3. If you scream in anger for your kid dog to come, you're out of your mind. Why would my kid dog come to me when I am screaming in anger?
4. Conversely, make the come command fun. If I want my kid dog to come to me, I need to say come here in such an enthusiastic way that the kid dog can expect nothing less than pure joy when he gets to me. Of course, this is training. Eventually, you can request his presence with a stronger tone, but for training purposes, be happy.
5. Patience is key. You don't teach a kid dog to rollover in a day.
6. Nothing is permanent. My kid dog may be going through a wake-constantly-in-the-middle-of-the-night stage or a chew-everything-in-sight stage, but it's all a stage. Again, patience is key.
7. Socialization at a young age is important. If my kid dog doesn't get kid dog time early on, he will have lots of difficulty learning how to play nicely.
8. When in doubt, throw treats at your kid dog. Okay, out of context, this sounds strange, but my dog has agoraphobia, and I am learning that giving him treats when we are out on a walk will help him associate things that might scare him with things that make him happy, happy, happy. 
9. Wear them out. My kid dog needs to chase a laser pointer light, go on walks, and chase balls. A tired kid dog is a happy kid dog.
10. Every kid dog needs intellectual stimulation. A tired brain is a happy brain. We play hide-and-go-puppy, as my son calls it. That wears both dog and boy out.



A happy dog.

The extra poundage, dog update

I gained a lot of weight this semester in a very short period of time. I learned, incidentally, that I am a comfort eater, which I would have denied prior to this semester. Now I'm working on losing it. I lost two pounds in two days without even trying hard, which just goes to show how much I was having to eat to maintain this weight. Last night was a bust, and I ate like a pig. I had forgotten to eat lunch, so I pigged out at dinner.

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Our new edition to the family, Triton the dog, is going to have to go. I like him a lot and especially like that he doesn't shed, but he has bitten both kids in the face. The tricky part is getting the lady from Boxers and Buddies to accept the towel I'm throwing in. She's an excellent dog trainer, and when I told her Triton had bitten Sawyer, she had me come to classes with her and had me follow certain dominance establishing procedures. He seemed to be getting better, and then he bit Rosalind in the hand and then later in the face. As a mother, my first priority is the safety of my kids. Plus, it gets exhausting always having to worry about where the dog is, where the kids are, and whether the dog is feeling threatened. The kids don't harass him, but Triton gets very nervous about feeling cornered, which is when he bites.

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I'm loving summer!

Equanimity, Part II

While I never discussed my thoughts on equanimity and my dog's death with the sangha, I did discuss with them my difficulty in balancing equanimity at work. We had discussed how equanimity's far enemy is overreaction, while its near enemy is apathy. I had mentioned to the sangha that with all the budget cuts at work (for those unaware, Nevada has the worst budget gap in all 50 states right now, and every school district is feeling the clamp), I wanted to be equanimous but feared being passive, especially since as department head, I represent others.

Kathy mentioned that she worked on equanimity while driving. It wasn't until the next day that I got what she was saying - don't start with the big stuff, doofess. (The doofess added on my part, not Kathy's.) Pay attention to reactions to daily irritations, not how you handle a dog's death or lay offs.

Doh!

So I've been paying attention to equanimity while I'm driving, which is kind of cheating because I don't get upset when I drive. But I kind of needed the freebie here. I was so down on myself over my grief that I was relieved to see I have equanimity somewhere in my life.

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Thanks to Tori for the kind comment. I stopped getting emails about comments and didn't realize it was there.

Life Update

I haven't blogged much lately, largely because I haven't had much to say. I have also started working again, so I have less time to spend in front of the computer, which isn't such a bad thing, really.

Gross factor warning/If you are squeamish, do not read this paragraph: My dog is having surgery this week to remove a mole that grew too large. It got infected and was nasty and scabby and bloody and gooey. Before he has the surgery, we have to clear out the infection and keep the area clean. This isn't a fun activity, cleaning his open tumor clean. Yes, it's an exposed tumor. YUCK! I'm actually looking forward to the surgery so that we can get this thing off his face and I can go back to not being eewed out every day.

A few years ago he had this neurological problem that he recovered from but that left him deaf and crooked. Literally crooked. His head is crooked and he can't walk in a straight line. Add to that the fact that he isn't the brightest dog, and this whole cone thing has been silly. He walks too close to doorways when passing from one room to another and therefore bumps his cone onto the door sill. But he doesn't realize what's happened, so he backs up and does it again. And again. And again. And again. He continues to do it until I move him over a half inch and he can move through the doorway with no problem.

Poor, old, sweet dog. I love him.

Shame! Shame! Shame!

Our big, beautiful beast of a black lab mix tangled with a skunk last night. Yes, he stinks, although the hydrogen peroxide/baking soda/dish soap mix made a good dent in the stench. Yes, our house stinks. Yes, I worry that I stink.

The worst is that he has a cut on his nose, and his rabies shots were outdated. I had taken in our little dog, but the big dog weighs almost as much as I do. I can't handle him when he panics at the vet's. Husband was on the spot for that, and unfortunately it hadn't happened.

Yes, we are sore, loser pet owners. Yes, we're hating ourselves right now. Yes, we are ashamed.

So we get a visitation from the county animal control on Monday. The vet doesn't think he was bitten, but we may still have to quarantine him. FOR SIX MONTHS! (People, get your pets' vaccines up to date, if they aren't already.)

We also paid $150 for some test to see if he has enough rabies antibodies to fight off an infection if he did happen to be exposed. Meanwhile, he has to stay outside, all by himself, away from people and the other pooch until we hear from animal control.

BIG :(