Saturday, April 18, 2009

Equanimity, Part II

While I never discussed my thoughts on equanimity and my dog's death with the sangha, I did discuss with them my difficulty in balancing equanimity at work. We had discussed how equanimity's far enemy is overreaction, while its near enemy is apathy. I had mentioned to the sangha that with all the budget cuts at work (for those unaware, Nevada has the worst budget gap in all 50 states right now, and every school district is feeling the clamp), I wanted to be equanimous but feared being passive, especially since as department head, I represent others.

Kathy mentioned that she worked on equanimity while driving. It wasn't until the next day that I got what she was saying - don't start with the big stuff, doofess. (The doofess added on my part, not Kathy's.) Pay attention to reactions to daily irritations, not how you handle a dog's death or lay offs.

Doh!

So I've been paying attention to equanimity while I'm driving, which is kind of cheating because I don't get upset when I drive. But I kind of needed the freebie here. I was so down on myself over my grief that I was relieved to see I have equanimity somewhere in my life.

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Thanks to Tori for the kind comment. I stopped getting emails about comments and didn't realize it was there.