Back to School

The end of vacation has arrived, and we had to go back to work today. I love my classes, love my job. Spending time with my children last week, however, was wonderful.

I can't believe how much I slept last week! I took two-hour long naps almost every day. I was burnt out, for sure.

DS has been talking away. Since the doctor's appointment where the doctor indicated concern that DS has "lost" language and that it may be an early sign of autism, we've been really focusing on his language development. In one week, he started saying and understanding an enormous amount. My favorite thing he does right now is when you ask for a kiss, he comes over to you and offers his cheek. He also like to mimick counting in his books and will tap his books with his fingers and go own, du, gra, the, foe. He isn't counting, of course, but it's still cute.

I've also been noticing his eye contact. He makes very good eye contact, which is a good sign that he isn't developing/doesn't have autism.

Off to Dharma Zephyr Meditation group.

Grasping

Today I did the homework assignment I gave the sangha last week - to choose a time when you are wanting something and to not give in to the grasping, rather to contemplate the feeling of wanting.

We were in Marshall's. DD needed some socks. (Good god! Where do they go?) I grabbed a pair of workout pants and top. A few minutes later, I took them out of the cart and returned them, but when I pulled them out of the cart, I noticed they matched so nicely! I felt a growing urge to throw them back into the cart, but fought against it.

It seems silly, I know. But I learned something. I learned that the feeling of desire to acquire something disappears rather quickly. Before I left the store, I had forgotten about the clothes. At home, I didn't sit and brood over how much I wanted those clothes. It was a good reminder to sit through the process of renunciation, especially with the process of acquisition. I will go so far as to say that most of us, me included, give in to these impulse urges to purchase, when if we try to sit them out, we find they are fleeting moments of desire.

Now, Starbucks' hot chocolates. That's another type of desire that doesn't disintegrate. It lingers until I give in. I'll revisit this thought later - need to consider ways to tackle that desiring process.

Not sure how this will end up working out. I wanted to post the document as a pdf file and realized it wouldn't work. So now I'm trying it as a jpeg file to see if it's readable. My sangha is considering a blog, but we want to be able to post pdf files. This is more of a test than anything, but in case you're interested, it is the final version of my hungry ghost outline.

Hungry Ghosts

Here's the outline for my Dharma talk I'll be giving on Monday for the Dharma Zephyr Insight Community. It needs some polishing, but it's a good start, I think. (Sorry for the funky formatting. It didn't transfer well from Word to here.) I'm nervous about doing my first Dharma talk, but I'm looking forward to discussing issues I find so interesting.

Hungry Ghosts: Buddhism and American Consumerism

I. Buddhist teachings relating to consumerism
A. Hungry ghosts – caricature of American culture; the hungry ghost festival
B.Causes of suffering – acquisition does not lead to an end in suffering, the cycle of suffering
C. The ego self – The need to define oneself through one’s acquisitions
D. Interdependence – The interrelationship between one’s actions and all other beings
E. General mindfulness – Americans consume mindlessly; mindfulness teaches awareness of one’s consumption habits
F. The four noble truths -

Problems with consumption
Global
i. Globalization – causes decline in culture and self-esteem of oneself and one’s culture
ii. Environmental concerns
iii. War
iv. Increase of poverty
Societal
i. Priorities
ii. Religion
iii. War
Personal
i. Spiritual neglect
ii. Continuation of suffering
iii. Time
iv. Addiction
1. To acquisition
2. To other addictions

Solutions:
1. Focus on the desire – when we seek an acquisition, it isn’t the item we want; it’s the feeling of satisfaction we get from the acquisition. This is transitory, and focusing on this will help us let go of the desire to consume
2. Engaged Buddhism
3. Small-scale activism
4. “Practicing greater generosity” – Joseph Goldstein: “The practice of generosity can serve as a corrective to addictive consumerism.”

Other relative issues
1. Marketing the Dharma
2. Consumption of knowledge

Just for fun

I love this picture of DS, even though traditionally it doesn't fit anything considered a normal portrait. It captures his go-get-it-ness. He's a blast.

On another note, his language development has been a little slow. The doctor is concerned that he has "lost" some words. Apparently this is one of the first signs of autism. Surprisingly, I am very calm about this. He hasn't been diagnosed at all, but no parent wants to hear that a word. Nevertheless, I feel pretty certain that things will be okay - that he probably isn't autistic and that if he is, we can still be a happy, loving family.

What I'm reading - I am reading two books right now. For work, I am reading Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison. I LOVE this book, but don't recommend it for everyone. It isn't a happy read. Ellison deals with the theme of self-identity, which is important to me probably because I'm a high school teacher and see young people dealing with issues of identity every day. I love this book so much that I almost named my son Ellison after the author. (We decided it was too close to Allison.)

The other book I am reading is called Hooked - Buddhist Teachings on Greed, Desire, and the Urge to Consume. This is a collection of essays by Buddhists on comsumption and its consequences. I'm reading it as prep for my Hungry Ghost talk I'm giving next week. I am loving the book, finding it enlightening and entertaining. I really enjoy reading essays, and since cunsumption patterns is a topic I find interesting, I am finding it fascinating.

School has gotten a lot more enjoyable now that I'm done with the research papers. I'm incredibly proud of my students for all their hard work and am glad to come out from beneath the heap of research papers. Now I have a ton of grading for AP, but it isn't nearly as overwhelming.

Hair Cut, Life update

• Took DD to get her first salon haircut last week. It was fun to see her actually sit still for a haircut and fun for me to not have to worry about how I was cutting. I found out that I hadn't been cutting it evenly. Oh, well. She's always cute - with a straight haircut or with a crooked one. Meanwhile, DS liked the "car seat."

• By now, you have probably noticed I haven't been up on the weekly challenge of a blog-a-day. With research papers en masse and DH's sprained ankle, very little has been done around the house or around the computer. No worries. I'm not beating myself up. I'll take March off and be back on the schedule next month.

• I get to give my first Dharma talk next week. It will be on Buddhist teachings on consumerism. It's focus will be American society as the hungry ghosts. Once the outline is finished, I'll post it.

New Monthly Challenge

I have revised my monthly plans:
Jan: low-impact consumption check
Feb: veggies at two meals a day check
Mar: a blog a day
Apr: A scrapbook page a day
May: a walk a day
June: A workout a day
July: Low impact consumption in honor of the Hungry Ghost Festival
Aug: a half hour reading a day
Sep: low-impact consumption
Oct: A workout a day
Nov: A thank you card a day
Dec: A meditation a day